Ask for help!!!

Do you remember what life was likefore Google Maps and smartphones?

Think back to when you were travelling to a destination you had never been before. You would've had some directions prior to setting out. However, 7 times out of 10 you'd still stop a complete stranger and ask for directions just to make sure your on the right path or because the directions and your current location weren't quite matching up. Most of the people you stopped and asked for directions probably hadn't even been to your destination but they were familiar with the area making it possible to give enough guidance to at least get you to the next checkpoint. 

Stop Learning!

"The soul always knows what to do to heal itself, the challenge is to silence the mind."

Alot of us has gotten so engrossed in learning that we have stopped thinking. We have gotten so accustomed to listening and picking people's ideas and stories that we have stopped looking at life from our own perspective.

Totally new stuffs are not created anymore, new ideas and theories are not shared anymore, everyone is busy recreating or redesigning something already created or spreading already existing ideas and theories.

How i almost set my house on fire

I could have set my house on fire yesterday. I wanted to prepare dinner for myself (noodles and fried egg). Since noon I had been seeing myself eating noodles as dinner and It was sweet ehn, so I was very highly excited when mum called me to come make my food as she was done making hers.

Ehn! As much as I was excited about the noodles (here’s the thing: mum brought a new type of noodles - Honeywell – to the house and when I tried the onion chicken flavour it was superb, so I had the intentions of trying out the pure chicken flavour so I could decide if I wanted to abandon indomie noodles) I was a little bit reluctant to stand up cause I was watching a movie titled Suits and was totally loving it.
Well sha I did stand up and went to the kitchen.

GHEN GHEN

I lit the gas, placed a frying pan on the gas, poured in oil to hit, broke, spiced and whisk my egg then I went to the sitting room to ask mum where the canton of noodles was. She couldn't remember exactly where it was so she directed me somewhere to check for it.

Where Does a Good Fruit come from?

A Tree is identified by the Fruits it Produces. A good tree would produce good fruits and so a bad tree would produce bad fruits.
The kind of Tree depends on how and where it is rooted.
Where are you Planted? How rooted are you?

The only way to become a good tree is to be planted in Christ, deeply rooted in Christ.
You become planted in Christ by BELIEVING In Him, but the depth of your roots depends on Your Faith and the only way to Build your Faith Is to Know God and the only way to know God is To via STUDYING HIS WORD AND PRAYING.
The more You Study and Pray, the better you know Him, the more you grow in Love (For God, For yourself, For the whole of Humanity), the stronger your Faith becomes and the easier it becomes to Obey God. When you obey God and live right you'd produce good fruits.

Battle against Shyness

Everyone has something they struggle with, Some low self esteem, others shyness, lack of self control, etcetera etcetera and these things if not dealt with would limit us a lot and make us lose some valuable opportunities. Aby Of http://misspurpleheart.com has had to battle with her's which is shyness and even though she's still a work in progress, she wrote something about it, hoping that it will inspire and help someone out there.
ENJOY :D
...........

I know there are a lot of people on a constant struggle with shyness, i know because i used to be one of them and i haven't even completely defeated it! You know what sucks? shyness comes with a load of self doubt and lack of self confidence; you don't want to say something to someone cause you don't know what they'll think, you don't want to do something you love
because you're not sure its good enough or you'll do it well enough...well let me tell you something...all that is BOLLOCKS!

Answer me this...

Appearance Vs Content

1) A lady in a faded gingham dress and her husband, dressed in a homespun threadbare suit, stepped off the train in Boston, and walked timidly without an appointment into the president's outer office. The secretary could tell in a moment that such backwoods, country hicks had no business at Harvard and probably didn't even deserve to be in Cambridge. She frowned.

"We want to see the president," the man said softly.
"He'll be busy all day," the secretary snapped.
"We'll wait," the lady replied.

For hours, the secretary ignored them, hoping that the couple would finally become discouraged and go away. They didn't. And the secretary grew frustrated and finally decided to disturb the president, even though it was a chore she always regretted to do.

"Maybe if they just see you for a few minutes, they'll leave," she told him.

And he sighed in exasperation and nodded.

Please Don't Procrastinate. It kills! It Steals.

"A stitch in time saves nine"

Procrastination is when you put off
things that you should be focusing on right now,usually in favour of doing something that is more enjoyable or that you're more comfortable doing.

I think procrastination is the most common bad habit of all time.
Everybody at one point in time says "I'd do it later".

WHY YOU SHOULDN'T PROCASTINATE
But just as it is the most common bad habit, so is it one of the deadliest bad habits.

Yes! Procrastination steals, it kills.

The more we put off things for later, the more

Don't Stop Learning

Too many people suffer from "destination disease." In other words, they've reached a certain level or obtained a goal, now they're coasting in life off of what they've already learned.
Studies tell us that 50% of people, after they graduate from high school, will never read an entire book the rest of their life.
One reason is that people see learning as a period of life instead of a way of life. They think, "I'm out of school. I'm done with my training. I've got my job."
But, God never created us to reach one level and stop. Whether you're 90 years old or 9 years old, you should be constantly learning, improving your skills, and getting better at what you do.

The key is that you have to take responsibility for your growth.
Growth is not automatic.
What steps are you taking to get better? Are you reading books? Listening to teaching CD's? Are you taking any courses on the internet? Going to any seminars? Do you have any mentors? Don't just coast through life relying on what you've already learned. You have treasure on the inside. Develop your talent and become all that God created you to be.

Your company Determines You

"Show me your friends and I'd tell you who you are"

"Birds of the same feather Flock together"

"You are the average of the five people you spend you most time with" - Jim Rohn

Statistics and History has proven that you become like the people you spend most of your time with.

.........

Was in deep thought today, when this hit me big!

It made go further in meditation and the end result was "Be careful your company, they determine to a large extent who you are and who you would become"

When I became friends with 'A', one could keep out just a handful of things we had in common but as days passed into weeks and weeks, month, the amount of things we had in common increased. Yes! We were rubbing off on each other.
The same goes for Me and my other friends and then, when I decided to look into Us as a group I realised that one could easily pick out things that WE ALL had in common. How did that happen? As when we just met, we were individualistic in majority of our ways and habits, but now, this individualistic habits and traits have slowly become what WE ALL DO.

No wonder, Parents always warn their kids about their friends.

Whether we choose to believe it or not, we influence our friends and vice versa and No matter how strong willed we may term ourselves to be, our defences crumble little by little with every passing moment we spend with someone, hence giving room for influence.

Look around you, are your closest Pals very different from you? Are their dreams and aspirations entirely different from yours? Are their perceptive of life and their pattern of thinking different from your's? Of cause Not! They are always similarities.

Infact, before you become friends with someone you look for a quality at least that they have in common with you or a quality you'd like to emulate and as the friendship grows, So the transfer of qualities accelerate.

All I'm trying to say is, Your company reflects who you are and who you'd be.

...........

So here's the Main Ish.

Surround yourself with the kind of people that have qualities you'd like to have.
Surround yourself with people who have succeeded in the area you'd like to succeed.
Surround yourself with people with similar values and perceptive.
Surround yourself with people with positive attitude.

Make friends with, people with whom you can grow together
Make friends with those you can look up to
Make friends with people you'd be proud to show off
Make the Right Friends, The one's that can help to rightly define you.

.......

If you are currently with the kind of friends that pull you back, that only take from you and have nothing to give, that fill the environment they are in with negativity, that lack the qualities you'd want to be associated with, that have different core values and perceptive from you, Then Please Run Away, Stay Away from them Or you'd find yourself, where you'd never wish to be.

God has your back always...
Jesus is the bestest friend you could ever have.

Be careful your company, They define you.

Still On Unconditional Love

"The most important thing in this world is to learn to give out love, and let it come in." ~Morrie Schwartz

Love is a strange and beautiful thing.
I always thought I knew what love meant. I grew up hearing the words all the time. It was on TV, in books and magazines, and people all around were saying it.
I thought I knew how to love. I mean, I told my teddy bear that I loved him because he kept me safe at night.
I told my sister that I loved her, only if she was nice to me and would play the games that I wanted.
But if I didn't get that new limited edition beanie baby, I felt differently for my parents. If my friends at school didn't give me the birthday presents I wanted, I felt
differently for them.

I seemed to only love the people and things that would give me something in return and that would allow life to go on the way that I wanted it to.
I never truly felt love, a love that was unconditional and all encompassing, until the day I first saw my dad cry.

My friends always tell me that my father is the happiest man that they've ever met. He greets everyone with open arms, and his smile is so big you can practically count all of his teeth.
The other day I came home, and my dad looked sullen, the smile usually spread across his face missing. He looked into my eyes and just collapsed into my arms, sobbing.
I could feel his sadness before I even heard the tears, from the way he put his entire body weight on me as if he needed help just standing, and the way he gripped me so tight like a child does with his mom on the first day of school.
My sister had just made a rash career decision that would leave her in a large amount of debt and temporarily unemployed. And my dad just didn't have
the money that she needed to help her out of her situation.
Growing up, my dad always told us that his one purpose in life was to give us the life that he never had.
And in his eyes, at that moment, he had failed.
You see, my parents are first generation immigrants from Vietnam. They come from impoverished families, both with more than 10 siblings each. Their journey to America is almost like a fictional tale to me, something
that they rarely talk about, with my dad escaping first, then my mom, aunt, and sister, who almost didn't even make it out alive.

At first, the American Dream wasn't all that it was made out to be. Yes, freedom rang, but so did the challenge of learning a new language, a new culture, a new way of making money and supporting a family.
But somehow, they did it. They raised my older sister and put her through college. They raised my aunt, and put her through college. They raised my twin sister and
me, and put us through college. And in the midst of all that, they found a way to sponsor all of their own siblings to emigrate to the land of the free.
It didn't come easy though.
They accomplished all of this, even if it meant working two (at times three) jobs. Even if it meant scrubbing floors, toilets, hospitals, classrooms. Even if it meant
working all day and night and surviving on only two hours of sleep.
Even if it meant tears and days where we all just cried ourselves to sleep.

Growing up, my dad gave me everything I wanted. He let me play sports, bought me nice clothes and toys, a new car-even if he had to sneak by my mother so that she wouldn't get upset about how much he was
spoiling me.
But at the same time, my dad expected straight As, and to succeed and excel in everything that I did. At times I would get so mad at him and scream and
complain about why he made me study so much when all of my friends were out having fun. His reply was always, "So you don't ever have to live a hard life like
us."
I always wondered how my dad made it, how he and my mom brought up three successful children and stayed together through it all.
This year, my parents will have been married for 35 years, and to say they've been through a lot is an understatement. They made sacrifices that threatened
their relationship with each other, with their brothers and sisters, and even their own parents-all for us.
There is never a day that goes by where my dad doesn't tell me "I love you" before going to bed. It's with this unconditional love that keeps him going strong, and that keeps him smiling every day no matter how tough things can be.
I was blind to this until that day I saw my dad at his most vulnerable point. Looking at him, bent over in my arms like a little child, I realized that unconditional love does not come easy; it is something learned and
practised.
It is through the toughest times, the happiest times, and every single obstacle of life that you can discover new ways of loving.
I did that day as I held my daddy, my hero, in my arms. I discovered just how to finally let the love come in that my dad had been giving me for 22 years, and not question or find a reason for it.
My dad has taught me that to love unconditionally is to love with absolutely no boundaries. Even when it hurts, his love is never failing; it stays limitless, never
changing.

There are times in our lives when loving someone else seems nearly impossible because of the difficult situations that we find ourselves in. There are times
when we say harsh things to people we love just because things aren't going our way, or because they made us unhappy.
In these situations, we find ourselves putting provisions on love. We attach it to how others are acting, and whether they reciprocate the feelings we give to them.
We attach it to the circumstances and emotions that go on in a single moment.
We find ourselves holding back, fearful of being hurt, afraid to sacrifice a piece of ourselves. But what if we looked beyond all this and just loved?
Love because you're grateful for the things someone has done for you. Love because someone needs you, needs a friend to lean on during their struggles. Love
even when it is difficult, even when your mind tells you that you shouldn't.
Love by looking beyond people's faults, struggles, and whatever pain and hardships that life may bring.

This unconditional love is something that can so easily be given if we recognise it, and that can change someone else's life completely.
When we love and treat each other with the utmost care and attention, the little things that bother us seem far less overwhelming.
What would the world be like if we stopped looking to get something in return, and just loved unconditionally, for the happiness and inner peace it brings us all?

By:
KC Dang

The Path of Career Choice

So I am on my bed...staring at  Microsoft Word on my system. Ever had that strong feeling to write an article but don't know what to write about? ...that's the feeling. Exactly how I'm feeling at the moment.

It's funny because writing has never really been my thing. Well, like a thousand other young fellas out there, I have had a zillion other things I had wanted to do growing up.
The first I thought of was becoming a doctor. That one was so strong. It was as though it was my destiny. I couldn't at that time see myself doing anything else. But then came acting, modelling, dancing, media, the list goes on and on.
As at now, I still have a few more on my plate. There's photography, painting, and I still want to be an OAP (On Air Personality). But the bulk of my passion now lies with photography.

Photography is an interesting field, pretty much on the expensive side.  So that's on the low for now. 
Painting - doing that at the moment. I completed my 7th job today.  All 'job-no-pay' as my kid cousin would describe it. Let's just say I'm a nice guy who finds pleasure in pleasing people. Of course I would love to be paid for all my services and time but I just feel that since all 7 persons I have painted for are either family or close friends, they ought to drop whatever the lord lays in their heart. But since they do not, I don't complain. My reward is in heaven...LOL. 
As for being an OAP, I have tried and still intend to keep trying. I often rehearse shows in my head all in a bid to get better. It makes me look disturbed but hey, it's a small price I have to pay if I want to be better in this field. I did a demo with my cousin some months ago for a radio station in Benin. Two demos actually. But apparently, we weren't what they wanted at the time. They wanted, "already made stars".
In just two decades, all these careers have all come up on my plate. Who knows, a few more would come up over the years and maybe one or two from the older ones would actually be the career I would follow, one never know these things.

If you pay attention closely you'd see that, the ratio of the educational field to the non-educational field is a 10:1.
I have my BSc Physiology in view which in a year and half or two years most likely would be completed. Yet, in all of these so far, it wasn't mentioned. Contrary to what you might think, I have great love for my chosen field of study. But, three years from now, is that what I would be doing? A question I sincerely cannot answer. There is an awful lot of things to do out there. A thousand more would be created in a few more years, months maybe.

Leaving the shores of Africa, you would discover how much career choices one is open to aside the educational field. When you walk the streets of Benin-City, Edo State, Ring road to be precise, you would find a shocking amount of wasting workforce with the excuse of disabilities, lack of educational background and all what not.
No doubt, all these things are limitations but there is no crime in 'begging for a purpose'. Most of the beggars u see today do not beg for a purpose. Whatever money they make today is for today with the hope to beg for tomorrow by tomorrow. The very same reason I cannot for any reason give such beggars a penny from my pocket. Take a look at this other beggar. She begs for two days and gets a little over a thousand naira. She takes the money, goes to an evening market, uses a little from it for her dinner that day and buys some oranges and pineapple with the other depending on what fruit is in season at the time. On the morrow, she takes her fruits to the market and sells them. She gets a little over a thousand five hundred naira. Repeats the same pattern she did the previous day, but this time takes the commission she makes and uses it to buy an extra variety of fruits. She sells them and gets a better profit. She then adds pure water to her sales, then sweets, biscuits, and keeps adding as the gain increases. In a very short time, her income would have grown from a street beggar's to a small time business woman's. Now that's business, one that doesn't require education or personal cash.
You can become anything successful in life with or without an educational background. All one really needs is a functioning brain.

"If you want to hide knowledge from a black man, put it in a book".
Yea right! I'm sure a large percentage of you reading this article hear this a lot. Well, in a way, this might be true. Honestly, I am not the biggest fan of books. Guess the world can tell that by now judging from my list of future ambitions. But again, when I come across a good book or article, I definitely would read it. From a few lines and paragraphs maybe, I would be able to tell if it's a good book (or article) or not. I mean, you are reading this article now to this point. What does that say? This is a good article. That's why you have read it up to this point. *wink. But on a serious note, "don't judge a book by its cover"? pufffffffffffffffff! Why put good stuff in rotten package? Packaging is everything, that's the only reason books like "7 KEYS TO SUCCESS", "HOW TO GET RICH IN 5 SIMPLE STEPS", could ever sell past a thousand copies. Why would I want to learn success tips from a book? The irony of it all is that some of the authors of these funny books are not successful. They tell you all sorts of rules to follow when they do not follow those rules themselves, but it's all business. Business from an idea. An idea from knowledge. The knowledge that Nigerians would do anything to make money, idea to make a book to teach them how to make the money, develops. Whether its true or not. The sales of that idea, be it true or not, fetches money for the author.

.The most important thing to note in choosing a career is PASSION. Point number one. 'Where your treasure is, there lies your heart'. What you don't love, you can't excel in. This of cause, the whole world already knows. Gone are the days where children go to school and read courses because of parent's choice. Well, it's alright to spend six years maybe, reading a beautiful course even when your heart isn't there because, no matter what passion influenced field of study to choose for yourself, it's always good to have something to fall back to. And that brings me to point number two.
.A wise man once said, "Always have a contingency plan". Now, if I want to follow my photography dream full time for instance (which of cause I would), I would need capital to start up. Now being that we are in a not so yet 'modernised setting', and "my son is a photographer" is not yet what any parent wants to brag about their children of, you need that certificate as your pillar. Both to stand erect and to fall back to or even lean on. What I am saying in essence is, say your parents choose your career for you for instance, even if it takes six years to acquire the certificate, do it with all diligence. Get the degree, and please don't give the certificate to them as many would say. Keep your certificate. It took you years to do it even in boredom so u can as well keep the certificate. Of cause, because I need capital to start, I sure would need to endure a little more of the boredom by working for some years or a few more wit all diligence. You don't want to get fired because that would cut your goal short.
Now, while working, you begin to save your capital for the business you want to start because only a handful of parents would support any child at this stage after spending an awful lot of money to get you through school. When you think you have all the capital you need, it is still best you work some more while going about the career to still have another source of income until your career springs up fully. Then it is ok to start backing off from this point. This also brings me to my third point.
.Now this is for the guys. Let's be frank with ourselves, if u had a beautiful daughter, who is of marriageable age and comes home with a suitor who u begin to interview in getting to know him and find out he isn't educated how would you feel? Or a man who doesn't have a "decent job" as they would call it. No matter how much money the young man has, you still would not be that approving.

So this points out another importance of that job you are using as a means for your capital. For the purpose of marriage, you need to be a career man. Don't get it twisted. Your chosen field of career is still moving in full swing. All I am saying is, there has to be "a job".
.On point number four, you have to consider the life span of that career you have chosen. A few years back, cyber cafe's were the 'in-business'. Today, people barely leave their homes to access internet services. With the invention of modern gadgets-phones, pads, laptops, and the increase in computer literacy, people do not have to visit a cafe anymore to access the internet. Not even to print because homes now purchase personal printers. You have to think of a career that a very vast percent of the population need and that would be around for a long while. Photography has been around from the days of our fore fathers and is even appreciating in the market today and still would be for a very long time. So durability is something to be considered.

A career is a life time thing so mistakes in picking one is something you should want to avoid. I have run out of words here so I will leave you in the hands of God because he alone can direct you in the path in which you can never go wrong...

By
Chux Osakwe
www.baggermouth.blogspot.com

Few tips on having a successful Relationship

Correct me if i'm wrong; The majority of relationships young people go into these times do not last. In a few weeks (sometimes days) a relationship ends - sometimes for reasons that could have been easily worked on or avoided. So uhm, i just want to share basic guidelines that when adhered to could increase the chances of having a successful relationship. PS: I'm open to more tips. :D

1)Be Friends First: Don't ever rush into a relationship. Don't date someone without knowing the person. You should know at least the basics like age,career choice,religion,hobbies,likes and dislikes. What does he/she do for fun? Who are their friends? Before you begin dating, there should be a lot of talking and asking questions. BE FRIENDS first.

2)Take your time: While dating, FOCUS on getting to know more about yourselves. SPEND TIME together, talk, play, pray, learn. Try to build and develop yourselves - as individuals and as a couple. Don't rush into intimacy,there's going to be time for that later,later later. He he!

3)Communication: Learn to TALK about anything and everything. TALK about your joys and your sorrows. Share secrets. Just talk. Communication is what keeps a relationship when everyother thing fails.

4)Ideologies: There'd always conflict if you guys do not share SIMILAR VIEWS. I don't mean views like the football team you support or political party you support. I mean career choices, religion,how many kids you want to have,where you want to live etc. These things if not settled early, if a compromise is not reached early could shatter the relationship.

4)Conflict: Now,you shouldn't be fearful of conflicts cause they must always show up. What makes the difference is how you handle conflict times.
First,i'd say NEVER ASSUME Don't assume to know what your partner is thinking and do not assume he/she knows what is going on in your head(well,expect he/she is a certified mind reader).
Also,do not INSIST you are right,even if you are - sometimes accept defeat so peace could reign. TRY not to end arguments feeling or making the other person feel degraded or humiliated.

5)Intimacy: Here's the big issue. Well i'd just say don't do anything except you really want to. Do not allow any one pressurize you into doing anything. If your partner cant WAIT till you ready then they do not love you and hence is not the right one for you.
And uhm, if you are going to get intimate before you wed, PLEASE BECAREFUL.

Try not to forget these:
*No body is perfect so do not expect a perfect person.
*The best relationship are a result of the effort, time and the work done.
*If you don't love yourself, nobody can love you.
*That thing you want,wants that thing too (you want cute and smart?, well cute and smart wants a cuter and smarter too). So work on yourself, so your want would want you too :D
*If God doesn't build a house,it shall definitely fall. So make God the foundation of your relationship.