DISILLUSIONED

Shared dreams
Shredded dreams
Promises made
Promises maimed

My wounds are awake
They bleed red ink
I bottled up these smiles
Hoping to get drowned in them

I held the bottle close
The sight pierces me
This moment - Moment when worry does all the talking,
I lost a piece of beauty

Beauty is you
Beauty is me
Beauty is us

My subconscious thought without me thinking
I despise my conscious
It births strange things

My subconscious births me
Who I am
The who I wanna be
The who I may not have become

My eyes trained on hope
Hope drifted far away
And walked into a thick cloud
I begged my soul to divorce this pain
The pain that encapsulates me

God I'm beat
Peace be my storm
Peace be me

My hands explore tomorrow like a blind man
Simmered and stewed
Emotion fluctuating
Between anger and hurt
I wanna feel larger than life

Who runs wild through the forest this long?
I need my survival skills back
What did I ditch it for?
What put this frail look on my face?

Completely disconnect
There is rightness about life
Life is supposed to feel good
It's a crime
Messing with something this good
These ........my exact words

Set me free
Make my soul lighter than a child's
Stir into the soul of my deeply wounded heart
Don't leave me oddly unsettled
Let me go
I said to my thoughts
The thoughts that caged me.

By Oluchi Ekeleme.