It's time to mix up with 'bad' people...

"We have the tendency to want the person to be a finished product while we give ourselves the grace to evolve"

Charles was from a Christian home but he didnt know God personally. He got into the university and got into drugs, he slept with every girl he could and soon, himself and his 'gang' got into robbery. He managed to finish his education and when he did, he got into drugs and internet fraud full time. He did make a lot of money tho.

Amy was a church girl. She came from a Christian home but unlike charles, she stayed through. She was born again and  had a steady relationship with God. She went to the university and came back unchanged, still godly.
Working at her Church office, all she wanted was a man who loved God more than he loved her. Oh! Of cause, she wanted him to be cute, smart, ambitious and financially stable enough to take care of her but the major prerequisite for a relationship was the love for God.

Life happened....

Charles and Amy crossed paths.
At the very moment their eyes met, the connection between them flared like an erupting volcano and somewhere deep down, they knew they were going to see again.

They did see and they did talk .... about everything and nothing. It was like love at first sight. The problem was, Charles lived an ungodly life, still doing drugs and all and Amy was a church girl who just wanted a man that loves God.

No matter how much she wanted to, she couldn't break of her relationship with charles. She didnt want to risk her relationship with God but she also didn't want to leave Charles. So, she prayed and decided she was going to try and 'change' him. Heheh!

Amy never forced Charles to do anything, she just stayed through to her morals and principles and Loved him through and through.

And so Charles who never went to church began to go because he loved Amy and Amy never stopped talking about Jesus. Charles who loved sex respected Amy's decision of abstinence till marriage. Charles who loved alcohol and party began to reduce them because it wasnt Amy's thing.

Amy never gave up on Charles.  No matter how hard it seemed at times, no matter how bad some of his addictions were or the things he did in his past, she loved him through it all. As Amy received God's unconditional love, she poured it on Charles, and as he received her love,  his heart began to melt. He began to change and one sunday service became two and then three, five, ten and then midweek service, and one day he gave He gave his life to Jesus.

Eventually,  Amy married a man who loved God more than He loved her. She married Charles, the man who found Jesus because she decided to not give up on him but love him through his process of discovery.

Like Amy, Most of us have qualities we want our spouse's and even friends to possess. We have standards we need them to meet in other to be qualified to be in our lives. But a lot of times, we get so carried away with these standards that we forget we are not perfect ourselves (or are you?).

We want them to love God, have vision, have found purpose, living their passion, creative, smart, etc etc but we forget that Life is a process, we all evolve, we are all capable of evolving and no matter how 'amazing' we are today, we didnt get here in one day... we grew.

We forget that we can be the water someone needs to grow. We forget that we can inspire (not force) growth and change in people. We forget that with a decision to love and encourage people, they can become anything they want to be.

I feel that sometimes, we write people off too quickly because they dont meet our standards, but what if we became the candle that lights others?

What if we loved more? What if we judged less?
Oh! Yes, he does some shitty stuffs and She's pretty messed up and has made a lot of mistakes but what if we judged and castigated them less but instead, loved them, encouraged them, motivated them, just stimulate a change and growth in them. What if we showed lost people the true path? What if we let hurt people know that they are forgiven? What if we gave people more chances?

I'm not saying we should go and become friends with everybody, I'm just saying maybe if we judged less and loved and encouraged more, people could be better. I'm saying if we allow God, He can use us to reach the lost, hurt and broken. He can reach some unbelievers through us.

Amy didnt just remain in Charles' life because she liked the guy but mostly because she felt God could use her to reach him. And as she loved him through his process, she maintained her principles and morals and didnt allow him pull her out of her relationship with God.

Everyone has his or her own issues... No one is perfect... We are all in a process towards perfection and until we get there, please keep in mind that a candle loses nothing by lighting another.
You never know what you will find until you look, you never know how far someone can grow and be better until you give them a chance to.

Judge less... love more!

Post script advice: If your relationship with God is not stable or if your will isnt strong enough, kindly love from afar, pray for them, smile at them. Just do what you can from afar because coming too close may destroy you. You may be the one to change. So becareful! Be discerning!

Have you read 'STOP LEARNING'? If you haven't,  see it Here