Dear Jesus, HELP!

I really didn't want to post this but ... I think I need to. So Here it is, my personal letter to Jesus.

''Funny thing is, I wrote it a few days before posting it and the next day, Jesus Answered! Maybe, that's why I'm comfortable posting it now because he has already answered. I don't know but I do know that God is amazing! 

And I pray that as you read, if you need His help in any way, in any form, and for anything, I hope he answers you on time - promptly as He did mine. 

Bear in mind that God spoke to me - calmed my storm, started the work in a very unusual way and in an unusual place. So, if you need Him, do not box Him. Just sincerely ask for help in any way you can - in writing like I did or in speaking or in whatever form - just be sincere and let him answer in His own time and in His own way. But be rest assured that He would answer!''

So Below is a letter I wrote to Jesus a few days ago because I was down - emotionally, spiritually and in every way possible. I just felt empty. I have been feeling this way for a while now though but it was time to plead and since I have been finding it hard to pray, I wrote this.

Eh, I can't say enjoy... Just well, read.

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'Dear Jesus,

Let me start with, I Miss You.

I know I haven't been the best. I know I haven't been making you very proud lately - honest truth is, I haven't been making myself proud either. I have been procrastinating a lot, not reading and studying a lot, knowing but not doing, thinking but failing to execute, not praying enough - at all, allowing my emotions get the better of me, allowing my demons rule. I just have been at my worst and I am sorry.

But here is the thing, I'm not writing to just say I am sorry, I am writing to say HELP ME. I know I'm great yea? I know that I am Strong, but not without you. I feel like I am losing myself, losing my focus, not pursuing purpose like I ought to. Honestly? I think I have been too focused on career. Mehn! Adulting is hard Jesus.

How does one effectively do everything? Work, Entrepreneurship, Ministry, Settling in a new town and home (and trying not to get too settled so you don't get too comfortable), learning to make care of yourself by yourself? It is hard! This NYSC year has been hard, out of my comfort zone and I am just tired of trying but also of lazying around. More than that, I am tired of not paying as much attention to you as I should. I Miss You!

So Lord, Would You Help Me? Take Over, Consume, Prune, Burn, Renew Me ... again!
My Heart is bleeding, I need You. I am almost lost, I am slowing going over board. Jesus, please Help!

I need to feel alive again. I want to fill full again. Consume my mind, my heart, my soul. Let the spirit take over. I know I know. I know that I have a part to play, You don't deal with robots, I know but I have also heard testimonies where you willed and won. So Lord, Will it in me. Create the burning, consuming desire. Holy Spirit, do not allow me to sleep. Jesus, let your zeal consume me, I want to burn for you, work for you, talk for you, live for you. Take away the other desires.

Renew my mind... Jesus, I have no willpower or self-constraint, if you do not will, it won't get done. So please will it strongly, do not let me die. Do not let me suffer. Do not let me fade away.

I Miss You Jesus and I need Your Help because, alone I am nothing and alone, I can do nothing.'


Your Favourite Child,
ITIMI, E. Peace