22 Lessons I Learned this Year and my Birthday Wishlist

Hey Guys,

Thanks for reading the last post - the one about my Lagos experience so far. It has got to be my most engaging post on this blog yet (not most read though), with over 50 cumulative comments so far - 17 on the blog, 16 comments on LinkedIn, a few on WhatsApp, Facebook and Instagram and oh a couple of emails too. I especially appreciate Alfred's email - he sent me links to download all the SLC messages (I'm still jumping for joy) and then, I got one email inviting me to talk on security in Lagos. Well, I'm still figuring out that one (:D).

All this is to say; Thanks for reading. I appreciate. To think that subsequent to that post, I hadn't written for this blog since February. Again! Thanks for reading and engaging.

The past week was super too, in ways I can't begin to articulate (or in this case, write) but I'm grateful to God. Like for real.

So It's my birthday is in a few weeks, and as it is my tradition every year for the last couple of years, I write a birthday post. One time it was 65 things about me, the next year, it was a very long birthday wishlist, last year, it was all gratitude and this year, I'm doing a little mix.

In this post, I'd be writing the top 22 things I learned in my 21st year (some of the lessons would be about me), and to wrap it up, I'd drop the top 7 things I want as birthday gifts. I'm not exactly expecting it from anyone actually, it's more of a wishlist for myself (but eh, if body sweet you... Biko buy am for me :D, or send the money to my account and lemme buy it myself :D)

Let's dive in, shall we? Gracias!

What I learned/re-learned about life and me this year.

As you grow older, it's okay not to have everything figured out. As Long as you keep trusting God, You'd be fine.

1. A Perfect Family is possible (well, not perfect-perfect, but perfect). With God at the center, everything is possible. Even though more and more dysfunctional families are springing up each day. Even though some men are still not worthy fathers, they are a few who are exceptions. and even though, we can't do anything about the families we were born into, we can definitely do something about the families we create. 1b. I have a mild case of daddy issues.
2. 80/20 principle. Do the most important 20% first for all duties/responsibilities. This is especially for multitaskers. Sometimes, it's hard to effectively juggle multiple jobs and excel or make an impact at all of them, but you can succeed if you learn to stick with the 80/20 principle. There is always the 20% of work that is the most important and valuable, do those ones FIRST for all tasks, then do the other 80% next. Learn to prioritize - IMPORTANT over just Urgent. Delegate when you can, if you can.
3. New challenges and opportunities excite me but also I get bored very EASILY. Scary! and I get easily distracted too. Also, I'm most productive in the early hours of the day, from 3am to around 1pm. I used to think I was nocturnal, but I guess having a 9-5 changed that a bit.
4. Impact takes a great deal more than just doing your job. Making a difference requires HEART, not just sweat. This year, I also learned that when my heart isn't somewhere, I can't work. I'm not the kind of person who works out of obligation, I'm not duty bound, but if I love a task or a role, I'd kill it.
5. Relationships are KEY. It's important not to burn bridges. People are key to where you are going and who you would become. It's important not to become dependent but then, understand that no one is an island and your next opportunity might come as a result of the person you knew as a child. So give your time and sweat to relationships, invest in healthy relationships, be the good guy.
6. Your Journey is YOURS. Own it, love it!
7. Social Media is Great but if you are not careful, you could become cluttered, unnecessarily vain, under pressure to impress etc. My advice? do not become your social media instead let social media become you. Sounds like the same thing but they are different.
8. Grow your community. Your inner circle - harness them, love them, make them blossom but also, your outer circle: your mentors and role models - Follow them deliberately, and learn.
9. With God, even when your life is spinning. It wouldn't be out of control but in control. In his control. Even when you are in the dip, know that God has his hands on you and he'd lift you out when he is ready. Understand that sometimes, you have to hit rock bottom to rebuild. So enjoy every part of the process because hey! you can't cheat the process. It's never easy, it's never all fun but it is in the process that you become.
10. Work Culture and work environment matter a lot (to me). It is important that more than anything employers employ people not just because of skill or competence but also because they fit your culture. Creating the right environment for your workers to thrive, be themselves, have fun and be friends would give you results. 
11. Money is important to me, but so is love and much more, is God. This is probably one of my most profound discoveries this year. Disclaimer: When I say money is important to me, I'm not talking about it in relation to other people. I really don't care how much a person has, but I mean it, in relation to myself. Making Money for myself is very important to me, but so is love and much more is GOD.
12. I love ART. Oh God, I love ART. 
13. When my heart is not somewhere, it is just not there and when it is. It is! When my heart is for someone, it just is.
14. Everybody has a story. Everyone has their own issues. Everyone is dealing with something. No one is perfect. So never judge someone until you know their story, and even when you do know the story, shut up!
15. Love Conquers All. When God got you, he got you! He'd never let me be, he'd never let me go. His love? His Spirit? Damn!
16. Life is not always a bed of roses. There'd be almosts, there'd outright rejections but there'd also be victories. Enjoy each phase & each test, learn lessons, get stronger and Keep the faith! Know this! As long as the sun rises, you'd be fine!
17. Run, Fight and no matter how hard it is or how bleak it looks... Do not grow weary! DO NOT SETTLE. Oh, my! Don't settle. No matter what, do not settle for less than you deserve in any relationship, in your career, in life. Settling is worst than growing weary.
18. Do not FIT in. Even when it's just you. Even when you want to. Even in the seemingly little things. People would surely respect you more when you stay true to yourself and your principles. See, it doesn't have to make sense to anybody, it doesn't have to be a big deal, once it's not you, do not give in to pressure. Do not fit in.
19. Celebrate little victories. The ones that happen inside of you, the personal milestones. Celebrate them. Learn to Celebrate yourself and the people around you. Celebrate for and with your friends, partners. Just Celebrate. Learn to appreciate people, especially your loved ones.
20. Buying stuff for myself makes me incredibly happy. It's therapeutic. So I have decided to not become extravagant but to buy myself a little something every now and again. Just because, I work hard and I deserve it.
21. Somehow, I have learned to love. Okay! That's wrong, the correct thing is I have learned to say I love you. Telling people I love them and feel it too, used to be an issue for me, but quite recently, I realized that it has become easier. I am still incredibly sensitive and yet, not open about my feelings, but yea ...
22. "We cannot tap into that power and hang on to excuses at the same time. Your heart, mind, and hands must be free to lay hold of all that is ahead of you. Understanding the psychology of your excuses is pivotal in having permanent victory over them. So, my question to you is: When did you learn to give up on yourself? " - Sarah Jakes Roberts.

I still have more to write, but let's stick to this 22, at least for now.

.. and Now! What do I want for my birthday (which is October 8th, in case you are wondering :D)
This Year, I want just 7 things. Lol! I said just. Here they are, in order of priority.

• A Laptop because mine is currently acting up and I just can't afford to be learning patience with a PC. There are other things in life to teach me that. And preferably a Macbook. Why? because it is high time :D. This macbook
• Sneakers because I love Sneaks (crying) and right now, I want this particular three (:D) in this order: 1. Nike Air Huarache 2. Keexs Slip On 3. Sports shoes. (I wear Size 39/40 or UK size 6/6.5)
• A Backpack just because I want a new black small one. Maybe this?
• Books: Novels actually - Francine Rivers Novels (aside Redeeming Love, Bridge to Heaven and Lineage of Grace), or Marketing and Business Books :D or Sinners in the hands of a loving God by Brian Zahnd or any book by Max Lucado.
• A Leather black very fine Journal
• Cakes. Unfortunately, I don't like Red velvet or Chocolate cakes. Just get me plain ol' Vanilla - Soft, Fluffy, Sweet, Butter icing :D.
• A lot of Love

If you read to this point (that's over 1600 words), mehn! You are AWESOME and I appreciate you honestly. Honestly.

Leave a comment, would you? Share the lessons you have learned this year with me, or your favorite of my lessons or say an early birthday greeting or preferably, ask for my account number (I'd really send it to you. :D)

PS: Lets hook up on Twitter or Instagram @peaceitimi