The Popular Concept of Open-Mindedness is Flawed

A few weeks ago, I got obsessed with the concept of open-mindedness and this was because I was in situations and conversations, that required me to be 'open minded', nonjudgemental and receptive to people's different truth. It was a great test but as I explored and trained my mind to be more open minded I began to wonder if there was a limit and if yes! What was it? I mean, to what extent does one stay open minded? Does open-mindedness require you take everything? Does it mean to have no filter? No boundaries? Does been nonjudgemental mean you 'fit in'? Where is the stopping point?

The more I thought about it, the more obsessed I became and so of cause, I kept thinking about it - and doing surveys - until I found for myself (Lord, Thank you for blessing me with an amazing analytical mind), an answer that felt right (Mind you! This is my opinion). With this answer, I concluded that the 'general perception of open-mindedness' is flawed. Here's why.

First of all, let's define open mindedness.
I asked a few friends what open mindedness meant to them and most of them responded by referring me to the Zen Story of a cup of Tea. And so it seemed that open-mindedness is likened to being open to new ideas/opinions, being open/receptive to learning, not necessarily having a filter but coming like a child, always open to learning, not holding your opinions and beliefs as truth but willing to accept the opinions and beliefs of others (if they argue well enough. Lol). This is correct, even Wikipedia says open-mindedness is receptiveness to new ideas.

This is also where I think the concept of open-mindedness is flawed because I believe there should be a limit of some sort to how receptive we are to new ideas and opinions due to how gullible and credulous the mind can be.

Yes! The mind is gullible, it easily bends to what it is continuously exposed to. What you watch, read and hear forms the content of your mind, produces your thought pattern and ultimately forms who you are (as a man thinketh, so he is). This is clearly seen in babies. They come into the world blank, open, and ready to take in, and oh! Take in they do. With No filter, no experience or lessons to look back to, they take in everything they see or hear.

Apostle Pauls advises in Rom 12:2 that we should constantly renew our mind so we can be transformed by God's word lest we would conform to the things of the world. It other words, Focus on God's word so your mind and thoughts do not get filled with the things of the world because once you pay much attention to those things, you would naturally conform. 

And so when we are advised to be receptive to new ideas and opinions, it is an advice that puts our minds at risk. Because if what we are being told makes sense, If it sounds logically correct and the other person knows how to put forth a great argument, then it would be easy to convince our minds to pick the new information and call it truth.

This bothered me a lot. I began to think, does this mean that I should stay closed minded? Do not partake conversations that are contradictory to what I currently know? {Yes! In business, being receptive to new creative ideas is highly advised (I advise it too)}, but when it comes to our belief systems ... That gave me a pause.  If I stay closed minded in an attempt to protect my mind (Prov 4:23 CEB - More than anything you guard, protect your mind, for life flows from it), then how do I learn? How do I grow?.

This new set of questions, drove me into another round of obsession but as usual, if you diligently seek light (knowledge), you would find it (James 1:5 - If you need wisdom, ask our generous God, and he will give it to you. He will not rebuke you for asking).

So Anyway, I realized that a great way to stay open-minded (receptive and willing to new ideas/opinions) is to develop a backdrop for your mind, a foundation that acts as a filter to which all new ideas have to pass through before they settle in. This way, while you still listen to and engage in open-minded conversations, read various kind of books et al, you would always have a filter that every information has to pass through and 'fight with'.

I recommend no other filter that the Word of God - (lol, for the atheists and non-believers, I guess you would have to figure out for yourself your core beliefs and stick with them otherwise, you'd be continually tossed back and forth, left and right by every new opinion you hear, by motivational/inspirational messages, and by logically sound ideas).

It's great to be open minded, that's the only way to learn, but you have got to protect your mind and ensure that it doesn't mess with your beliefs. It's important to love your truth, but to live your truth, you have to first discover what your truth is and always leaning to what you read in motivational or what not books wouldn't help.

Now, I understand that just because one is open-minded doesn't mean they accept any idea the minute it is presented to them. It's expedient that you always consider thoughtfully or evaluate new ideas and beliefs before you accept them as true but my issue is this: The more you are exposed to an idea or opinion, the more likely you are to accept it. The more eloquent the person selling the idea to you is and the more motivational/inspirational and logically sound an idea is, greatly increases the likelihood of its acceptability. Thus, without you consciously developing and using your filter, the more gullible (albeit subtle) you would become.

So in this coming year (2017), DELIBERATELY PROTECT YOUR MIND. GUARD YOUR BELIEFS. FIND YOUR TRUTH AND LIVE IT.

I'd love to hear your thoughts. Do share with me by commenting. Gracias!

How our Experiences and Information Influences our Perception and Understanding of life.

Have you ever had that eureka moment? You know that moment when suddenly things that were not clear to you once before, becomes really clear and then you realize that you fully understood the situation? I bet it has happened to most people here. I bet we all can, in some way relate to that ‘ah ah! this is it, yeah?’ feeling. I particularly remember one of my most formidable ‘ah ah, so this is it’ moment. It happened a few months ago. I was thinking about the period of my life in the university when my life was filled with so much drama because of my friends. They were a lot of happy times, lessons learnt and growth but also a lot of quarrels, disappointment, depression and hurts (You know how girls can be yea?). So anyway, a few months back, I began to play everything back,

right from the first day I met this particular friend to the day I decided I didn’t want to be friends anymore. I played back as many scenes as I could remember, I analysed each situation, my reaction, what could have been done differently and what really couldn’t be avoided. I spent weeks thinking and analyzing my feelings during that three years and in that period of reflection - unbiased reflection, I got to know myself a lot better and I realized one very shocking fact: that as smart as I and everyone thought I was, I was really naive and gullible at that time. You see that fact - that light, changed a lot of things but most importantly, it gave me a different view of my world as I began to see a couple of things very differently.

When I understood, things that looked complex and really weird, suddenly began to make sense.

You see, we mystify and call complex what we do not know or understand.

This is what I want to explain, the theory of complexity as it relates to how much we know and understand.

F.O.C.U.S; Achieving the Most - (Guest)

For many people, jumping into new projects without finishing the other one is the way to go. They keep having things in their head they want to accomplish. They want to improve on their job, start a fashion business on the side, start a family, link up with a cousin abroad to start importation...They want to do it all so they get into all these and lack the ability to see anyone to completion. At the end of the year, they are left with unfinished goals. But they felt excited at the start; they were motivated at the beginning only for the motivation to wane over time. They move on to other new projects and then the cycle repeats itself.

Life Lessons 2.0 | What Growing Up is Teaching Me.

Peace Itimi, Why haven't you written in so long?  

''I don't have a good enough reason but allow me to try please? Thanks.
...because so much has been going on in my inside. Because I'm growing up and figuring out who I want to be, what I want to do, & why I should bother doing the things I do. Because I have written so much in my thoughts but haven't been able to pen them now; specifically for this blog. Because.... I have been focused on something else. Bla Bla Bla. 

Truth is, I have been too Lazy and a bit distracted but mostly lazy. Forgive me alright? 

To further redeem myself, I have decided not to let another month pass without writing something down; So here it is.'''

I have been reading alot Gosh; {the feeling of light filling your heart and mind as a new revelation, information comes to you. Awesome!!!}. Learning is fun... No matter the subject, learning is fun. 

Anyway, Moving on, this post is a list of some life lessons I have deliberately learnt in last months. Some I picked from books, some from experiences, some I heard in my spirit, some came as a result of deep introspection, some well... 

Enjoy!

Lesson one: Your life is Your Own. 

Embrace the uncertain; Start Now (GUEST)

As humans, we are uncertain about some things like when we may die, who we may meet on the way tomorrow.  Nonetheless, these things are the spice of life like surprises. Sometimes, you feel as though some people were giving a handbook for life, except you. Do you keep waiting for that special moment when you will finally say “yes I’ve made it” and you feel like you're on top of the world?

Why are you waiting? Start now and act. Most times when we keep on waiting for that special moment when we arrive, we may find out that those special moments may never come. Instead, we work to make them happen. If you want to be an excellent speaker or a prolific writer, you don’t have to wait for a special moment—you start writing, speaking and later that moment comes.

Shopping With The Biggest Classifieds - (Sponsored)

Jiji.ng is the biggest Nigerian classifieds, which present the advantages of online shopping. 

Complaints Box Nigeria Breaks Record with 1month Tweetathon

     Customer service is a serious issue in Nigeria. Everyday, someone experiences a bad customer service; from telecommunications companies, to the market woman at the market, down to the banks, eateries, bus conductors - really in Nigeria, bad customer service is everywhere. Its the reason you go on social media and see all sorts of complaints. Its like these service and products providers forget that without us the customers, they will run out of business. 

     Well, in attempt to curb this issue and educate the general public on everything 'customer service', Complaints Box Nigeria has come to give voice to your complaints about poor Customer service in Nigeria and help seek redress. (They are doing a great job already...check their twitter timeline).

    For the whole month of February 2016, Complaints Box had a 1 Month (One whole month, Feb 1st to 29th, no day missed!!) Tweetathon on Consumer Deserves Better on Twitter.