The Popular Concept of Open-Mindedness is Flawed

A few weeks ago, I got obsessed with the concept of open-mindedness and this was because I was in situations and conversations, that required me to be 'open minded', nonjudgemental and receptive to people's different truth. It was a great test but as I explored and trained my mind to be more open minded I began to wonder if there was a limit and if yes! What was it? I mean, to what extent does one stay open minded? Does open-mindedness require you take everything? Does it mean to have no filter? No boundaries? Does been nonjudgemental mean you 'fit in'? Where is the stopping point?

The more I thought about it, the more obsessed I became and so of cause, I kept thinking about it - and doing surveys - until I found for myself (Lord, Thank you for blessing me with an amazing analytical mind), an answer that felt right (Mind you! This is my opinion). With this answer, I concluded that the 'general perception of open-mindedness' is flawed. Here's why.

First of all, let's define open mindedness.
I asked a few friends what open mindedness meant to them and most of them responded by referring me to the Zen Story of a cup of Tea. And so it seemed that open-mindedness is likened to being open to new ideas/opinions, being open/receptive to learning, not necessarily having a filter but coming like a child, always open to learning, not holding your opinions and beliefs as truth but willing to accept the opinions and beliefs of others (if they argue well enough. Lol). This is correct, even Wikipedia says open-mindedness is receptiveness to new ideas.

This is also where I think the concept of open-mindedness is flawed because I believe there should be a limit of some sort to how receptive we are to new ideas and opinions due to how gullible and credulous the mind can be.

Yes! The mind is gullible, it easily bends to what it is continuously exposed to. What you watch, read and hear forms the content of your mind, produces your thought pattern and ultimately forms who you are (as a man thinketh, so he is). This is clearly seen in babies. They come into the world blank, open, and ready to take in, and oh! Take in they do. With No filter, no experience or lessons to look back to, they take in everything they see or hear.

Apostle Pauls advises in Rom 12:2 that we should constantly renew our mind so we can be transformed by God's word lest we would conform to the things of the world. It other words, Focus on God's word so your mind and thoughts do not get filled with the things of the world because once you pay much attention to those things, you would naturally conform. 

And so when we are advised to be receptive to new ideas and opinions, it is an advice that puts our minds at risk. Because if what we are being told makes sense, If it sounds logically correct and the other person knows how to put forth a great argument, then it would be easy to convince our minds to pick the new information and call it truth.

This bothered me a lot. I began to think, does this mean that I should stay closed minded? Do not partake conversations that are contradictory to what I currently know? {Yes! In business, being receptive to new creative ideas is highly advised (I advise it too)}, but when it comes to our belief systems ... That gave me a pause.  If I stay closed minded in an attempt to protect my mind (Prov 4:23 CEB - More than anything you guard, protect your mind, for life flows from it), then how do I learn? How do I grow?.

This new set of questions, drove me into another round of obsession but as usual, if you diligently seek light (knowledge), you would find it (James 1:5 - If you need wisdom, ask our generous God, and he will give it to you. He will not rebuke you for asking).

So Anyway, I realized that a great way to stay open-minded (receptive and willing to new ideas/opinions) is to develop a backdrop for your mind, a foundation that acts as a filter to which all new ideas have to pass through before they settle in. This way, while you still listen to and engage in open-minded conversations, read various kind of books et al, you would always have a filter that every information has to pass through and 'fight with'.

I recommend no other filter that the Word of God - (lol, for the atheists and non-believers, I guess you would have to figure out for yourself your core beliefs and stick with them otherwise, you'd be continually tossed back and forth, left and right by every new opinion you hear, by motivational/inspirational messages, and by logically sound ideas).

It's great to be open minded, that's the only way to learn, but you have got to protect your mind and ensure that it doesn't mess with your beliefs. It's important to love your truth, but to live your truth, you have to first discover what your truth is and always leaning to what you read in motivational or what not books wouldn't help.

Now, I understand that just because one is open-minded doesn't mean they accept any idea the minute it is presented to them. It's expedient that you always consider thoughtfully or evaluate new ideas and beliefs before you accept them as true but my issue is this: The more you are exposed to an idea or opinion, the more likely you are to accept it. The more eloquent the person selling the idea to you is and the more motivational/inspirational and logically sound an idea is, greatly increases the likelihood of its acceptability. Thus, without you consciously developing and using your filter, the more gullible (albeit subtle) you would become.

So in this coming year (2017), DELIBERATELY PROTECT YOUR MIND. GUARD YOUR BELIEFS. FIND YOUR TRUTH AND LIVE IT.

I'd love to hear your thoughts. Do share with me by commenting. Gracias!

F.O.C.U.S; Achieving the Most - (Guest)

For many people, jumping into new projects without finishing the other one is the way to go. They keep having things in their head they want to accomplish. They want to improve on their job, start a fashion business on the side, start a family, link up with a cousin abroad to start importation...They want to do it all so they get into all these and lack the ability to see anyone to completion. At the end of the year, they are left with unfinished goals. But they felt excited at the start; they were motivated at the beginning only for the motivation to wane over time. They move on to other new projects and then the cycle repeats itself.

Life Lessons 2.0 | What Growing Up is Teaching Me.

Peace Itimi, Why haven't you written in so long?  

''I don't have a good enough reason but allow me to try please? Thanks.
...because so much has been going on in my inside. Because I'm growing up and figuring out who I want to be, what I want to do, & why I should bother doing the things I do. Because I have written so much in my thoughts but haven't been able to pen them now; specifically for this blog. Because.... I have been focused on something else. Bla Bla Bla. 

Truth is, I have been too Lazy and a bit distracted but mostly lazy. Forgive me alright? 

To further redeem myself, I have decided not to let another month pass without writing something down; So here it is.'''

I have been reading alot Gosh; {the feeling of light filling your heart and mind as a new revelation, information comes to you. Awesome!!!}. Learning is fun... No matter the subject, learning is fun. 

Anyway, Moving on, this post is a list of some life lessons I have deliberately learnt in last months. Some I picked from books, some from experiences, some I heard in my spirit, some came as a result of deep introspection, some well... 

Enjoy!

Lesson one: Your life is Your Own. 

What to do when you are in The Waiting Period...

There are times in life when the going gets hard. When you try and try but yet nothing is happening. Times when you feel stuck. You feel you should have passed through that phase but you are not moving yet. Recently I felt like that. I wrote my last undergraduate exam August 28, 2015 and almost three months after I haven’t defended my project, just because my department is slow and annoying.  I began to feel angry at a time, because I had things lined up that I wanted to do, and had had to pass out on opportunities just because I’m technically not done with school and so cant officially relocate yet. I was mad for awhile, but then I let it go because it was no use using up my energy for something I had no power over.  Anyway a friend called me one day and in a bit to console me, was saying how he strongly feels that this is a waiting period and that I’m strongly feeling stuck for a reason. At that time I didn’t want to agree because it was just project defense (which in my mind was my department fault and nothing else).  Fast forward to five days later,

400 Character x 13

Been wanting to write something here but I start and find I'm not able to write above 400 Characters and so, I end up posting it on BBM Channel.

However, I have decided that those that haven't subscribed to my BBM channel need to see what has been on my mind.

So here are my last 13 BBM posts:

1) Sometimes we are so desperate to succeed and become like the people we admire that we forget that Success doesn't Happen in a day. It's a journey.... it takes time (hours, days, months or years. The point is, success won't come the minute you start working towards it).

In your journey, be receptive and open minded enough to LEARN! Appreciate your little victories. Run your own race.

'.....and that Peace'

When was the last time you felt peace in a great storm?
Mine was last night!

         Something happened to me on Friday and it was in truth, very scary. But as at that time, I was not perturbed. But then last night, something shifted, it was like the reality of the situation and what it may turn out to be, hit me strong and I lost it...Lost all control, all restraint, I began to panic. I wept! I tried to pray, I really tried but I couldn't find the words (nor tongues), I was weak. I gave into the storm.

The only Key to success is ....

I learnt something recently: 'Keep the Grace factor aside a bit' anyone irrespective of their beliefs, ideologies and religion, can succeed in anything (be it something they like or not), if they put their mind to it.

In the last three weeks, I have seen me just do it.... no matter how annoying or unpleasant or uninteresting it is. And every time I break through my limit just to get it done, I'm reminded that we have in us the innate ability and capacity to do and succeed at anything. We just have to want to bad enough. There's no limit.... The limitation you see is just in your head, if you can break out in your mind, and be willing to work your as* off to achieve your dreams, you would get there..
If only you are disciplined and determined enough.

........I have fallen in love again! plus #15for15challenge

'The title is #wash'.

One of the best nights I have had this year was on Friday, one of the reasons was I was alone in my room (which though I live alone is rare a thing these days, I always seem to have someone around), and so I had time, serenity and space to mediate, listen and feed my mind. I started the evening by going through a new set of spoken words I acquired and for the first time in soo long, I found myself deeply ministered to, it was like God led me to the particular videos I kept opening. As I listened to the words, my spirit soared, I found myself fall on my knees and cry out to God, thing is I have some things bothering my heart and I mention them to God now and again but as I watched those videos, I knew it was time to gracefully kneel and cry out and as I did, I found peace, I saw love, I felt warmth. And Just as I about to sleep I came across a video of Janette..ikz of P4CM, voila! She was married....

Fuel your passion.....Use your gifts!!! (15for15challenge)

A couple of weeks ago I was at Oleh in Delta State to deliver a training on Digital Marketing. While my team guys were setting sound and making sure the hall was ready, myself, and two other people went outside to set up our roll up - very tall banner.

For minutes on end, we kept struggling to set the banner up but every time we tried it fell back because none of us was tall enough to hold the tip. When I saw we were struggling too much, I called a very tall friend to come help us and in 10 seconds, the banner was up.


I was highly impressed. Not just he did it but because He (one person) did effortlessly what myself and two others had been battling with for minutes. At that very moment, the Holy Spirit brought to my remembrance "the easiness found when we work in line with what we are made for.'

I Had an Accident that broke my knee

I had a minor accident on Tuesday and since then I have been having problems walking, bathing and holding biro as I have injuries on my palm and on my knees.
The accident has put me in a reflective mood (you know, genius is born in time of depression, desperation or incapacitation...hehe). In the reflective mood, I learnt that I shouldn't kill myself for things that would go on with or without me. When you are dispensable, Act wisely and cautiously. Give your best but keep your sense.

This period has also enabled me redefine some relationships but the most important lesson of all is Your Sh** could be someone's roses.

THAT INTELLIGENCE IS A FACADE!!!

I have this theory. It states that no one is intelligent or innovative until he produces results.

There are people we know that have great ideas and great initiatives and people that know a lot about diverse subjects. This people sometimes intimidate us when they talk about what they know or that which they can do. These are people we all respect and call smart, Intelligent, Creative and Innovative, but I beg to differ.

Cast the bitterness off

I'm grateful to peace itimi for this opportunity to be featured on the blog. I love the fact that she's amazing in her own way and has challenged me greatly in pursuing so many things which I've abandoned.     

 
Alot of us have been through some tough stuffs, stuffs we don't even want to share with anybody. It could be an addiction, a broken heart, hurting someone so bad, an abortion etc. But whatever it is, its time to let it go.

You have to forgive yourself, and make the decision to let it go. The only way you can accept new joy and happiness into your life is to make space for it rather than fill your heart with pain.

Understand that, things don't disappear on their own. You can write it out, talk to someone you trust about it, or cry and pray about it. Whichever way, its time to get it off your system.

Thoughts!

Thoughts…Forever muddled somewhere in my mind
Forever a subconscious presence
Forever an uninvited existence
Forever a plague.

I gasp beneath its choking grasp
Struggling to wrench free of its relentless hold
I squirm free, running off into the vagueness
Yet I stay pinned under its ravaging claws.

GUEST POST --- Holding on to that last shred of Hope!

Turn up turn up ladies and gentlemen, I am super excited to finally get an opportunity to write a post on my Pastor Partner in Crimes blog. Heheheh She has one of the coolest blogs available, and I am super grateful to Peace Itimi for this awesome opportunity. Leeme add that I am a mega fan of hers ooo, so amma gonna hope for 1 night, do fasting and prayer for 39 days and 39 nights, and soak my chaplet inside of water that she puts up this post :) She bad like that gan.. I so love this Blog cause i soooo soooo love the author and the dexterity and wisdom with which she posts. So leggooo.. You see ehn, its funny how life is,  how things play out, how no body any where has it perfect regardless of their beauty and wealth, how the rich also cry and the beautiful ones have a scar on their souls, one which even their best and most expensive make up can never cover. Its funny how the lives of people looks so perfect and shiny on the outside, where as on the inside we never know the battle they fight, nor the demons they face. Well in my 23 years 1 month 12 days eyes, we are all fishes swimming in the ocean, constantly tossed by Tidal waves.

I Was Asked to Probate

      One year ago, i was sitting on this bench, in a teenage meeting at my church, thanking God for grace and strength to read, and for a successful completion of my 2nd year in the university. One year after, i am sitting on the same bench on the same spot in the a teenage meeting at my church, not sure how or whether to thank God for the completion, (hopefully successful), of my 2nd year...AGAIN!

Ts DECEMBER.....Process, Patience and Paths

Its a great day yea? Its the first day of the last month of the year and I can't help but be thankful for God's mercies and grace. 2014 is coming to its end and I'm witness to it, not because of how I am but because of whose I am. Because my Father has counted me worthy to be alive.

As I kept thinking of how great it feels to see December 2014, I couldn't help but remember those who didnt get here. Those people who died a couple of hours/days/weeks before December 1st. Its sad and I pray most earnestly that majority of such would have had Jesus in their heart because at the end of our temporal existence on earth, the only factor that would count as regards where we spend eternity is having or not having Jesus in our hearts and what would count in the lives of those we leave behind is not how much money we had/how successful we were or how often we had

The blessing is in the application

I think the most enjoyable sleep is that which happens after you first wake up in the morning. That 5/10mins sleep you allocate to yourself before you finally stand up to begin the day. That struggle, - the battle between sleeping a little more or standing up to begin the day could be one of the toughest, yet that few minutes of sleep is very relaxing for me. It does something to my system.
No! Chill! This post isn't about sleep. Its about what the Holy Spirit whispered to me while I was observing my sleep after sleep this morning.
He said and I quote 'THE BLESSING IS IN THE APPLICATION'.

Learn to Waste resources...Its for the greater good. Trust me!

I'm on Industrial training at 7up Bottling company, Benin Plant. I work in the quality control department - doing plenty test and analysis at practically all stage of production just to make sure we don't give the citizens of Edo state bad beverage. Its been fun, well at first it was fun, i was curious to know how to do all the tests and what happens in the various stages of production but now that i know alot, i'm getting really bored of the routine and damn! The struggle to get out of bed in the mornings ain't funny but all in all, in the few weeks I have been there, I have Learnt one viable lesson - HOW TO WASTE!

Here's the gist:

Mental slavery

"Emancipate yourself from mental slavery... none but ourselves can free our mind"

I heard that quote and my mind took a paradigm shift. It sunk so deep and resonated so well within me that I Cant forget what that exact moment looked and felt like.

That day, i realised we limit ourselves,  we set boundaries when there actually isnt any boundary. We hold our minds in captivity, allow what the world says to be our guide and 'think as think we should'. Most of us are held captive as mental slaves. We never allow ourselves to dream or look beyond the ordinary.  We see only the obstacles and not the possibilities. We allow our situations determine us, we allow people think for us, we become solely the product of influence. We never allow ourselves look within us, break free of all 'limitations' and create our own fate/reality.

The moments that changed my life.

I don't know the exact moment my life changed. Was it when I was at home giving my colleagues ideas on some ish? Or was it when I became the mediator between my colleagues and our boss? Or was it when I woke up that monday morning and realised,  I was really at the summit? Or was when it i was chosen to lead that little group even though i protested against it? Maybe it was when I unconsciously took up the responsibility to get my group (go team Red, hehe) in place so we could get to work or maybe it was when my group officially made me the leader or maybe it was when I got up on stage and began the presentation or maybe it was day that, over a year ago at a seminar where I met Alex and he gave him his card or just maybe it the day I finally put all efforts in sending my application or maybe it was that day over two years ago when I met Ejay because but for Ejay I wouldnt have gone for the meeting point and i wouldnt have met alex and I probably wouldn't be writing this.